5 Tips for Being Assertive With Your Boss
by Jonar C. Nader
(ARA) - The clock on your computer reads 9:50 a.m. Your palms begin to
sweat and your heart beats
faster as you realize your meeting with the boss is only ten minutes away.
How will the boss react to your
suggestions or your demands? Do you really want to take a stand with your
boss, or should you be
Intimidation and fear of authority is a common occurrence in the workplace,
but being assertive at work
and in life shouldn't have to be a nerve-racking experience. It should
be considered a stepping-stone to
improving your life and the components therein.
According to best-selling author, lecturer and technology consultant, Jonar
C. Nader, all staff members in
an organization should feel empowered to express their views to their superiors;
indeed, these workers
ought to think of themselves as high-level employees. "Staff members are
there to execute
management's plans. From execute we arrive at the word executive. Staff
members [therefore] are
executives," Nader writes in his new book "How to Lose Friends and Infuriate
People." This controversial
philosophy may not sit well in the executive offices of corporate America,
but according to Nader, it's
imperative that workers establish the proper mindset before they confront
Nader offers five tips to help you address problems and concerns with your
boss. These strategies can
also be applied to other relationships and begin a life-long process of
1. Pick the right fight and understand the root-cause of the problem. Asking
yourself what you are trying to
achieve can lead to the discovery of your true motivations, healthy or
2. Try to keep your energy in check. Mental, physical and emotional energy
are all important when
addressing someone about a problem. "At the end of the day, after you assess
everything, all you have
that is of value for a fight is your energy," says Nader. By wasting this
energy unnecessarily, you decrease
your chances of achieving the goals you've set.
3. Before confronting your boss, it's important to decide if the fight
is worthwhile. By examining the bigger
picture and questioning the company or institution as a whole, you can
examine if your energy would be
better utilized somewhere else, on someone else. Nader argues, for example,
that it's a waste of time to
battle a boss who has been "demoralized and crushed by the corporation"
- he or she likely will move on
and be replaced by another boss. "You are best to decide if the company
is right for you," says Nader, "or
if you should be fighting the corporate culture instead."
4. If you determine the problem is truly with your boss, you must be willing
to accept the consequences of
confrontation. Ask yourself if you are in a position to be picking a fight.
Engaging in an argument over a
minor issue may be an unwise decision if you can't afford to lose your
5. When addressing problems with superiors or others in your life, it is
important to remain courteous
and honorable without giving in to the "yes man" syndrome. Walk in the
door with your facts straight.
Controlling your emotions is an important aspect of communication, but
knowing you are right gives you
more power and leverage to achieve your final goal.
Nader points out that addressing problems and concerns at work also means
becoming a leader, for
yourself and for those around you, and affirming your purpose in doing
so. In his book, Nader
characterizes a leader as someone who creates, someone who is willing to
cut a new path. New paths
are often rocky, but they also can be the most rewarding. He explains that
people are neither leaders nor
followers, but both. "There exists a famous notion that 'to lead, one must
follow.' This is fallacious. To
lead, one must follow one's spirit faithfully, not other people," Nader
explains in his book.
Standing up for what you believe in isn't always an easy thing to do, especially
when dealing with
authority figures. Being able to ask for what you want, or offer a suggestion
without fear of rejection
means you are beginning to take control of your life. "If you don't control
your life," says Nader, "Someone
For more information on Jonar C. Nader and his book "How to Lose Friends
and Infuriate People, visit
Nader's Web site at www.logictivity.com.
Courtesy of ARA Content, www.aracontent.com, e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org
EDITOR'S NOTES: For more information on Jonar C. Nader, visit his Web site
at www.logictivity.com, or
call Brian Feinblumb from Planned Television Arts at (212) 583-2718.